SOOO AFTER MUCH THOUGHT AND EVENMORE THOUGHT I HAVE DECIDED THAT 2010 IS GOING TO BE MY LAST YEAR AS A CALI CHIK..... :( YUP SAD I KNOW BUT ITS TIME FOR ME TO LEAVE.
IVE BEEN TRYING TO PINPOINT FOR AWHILE WHAT HAS BEEN MISSING IN MY LIFE AND WHAT HAS BEEN HINDERING ME FROM REALLY GROWING AND BEING HAPPY AND I THINK I FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT.
WHEN I FIRST GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL I WAS SOO EXCITED AT THE THOUGHT OF GOING TO A 4 YEAR SCHOOL THAT HAD MEANING TO MY FAMILY AND WHERE I COULD GROW AND LEARN MORE ABOUT MYSELF AND A NEW ENVIRONMENT. ITS BEEN ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT I JUST LET SLIP TO THE BACKGROUND AND BECAME CONTENT TO JUST TO TAKE WHAT LIFE GAVE ME.
CONTRARY TO THE POPULAR BELIEF ABOUT ANJL I'M NOT DINGY.... IN FACT IM BEYOND KINDA SORTA INTELLIGENT, WHICH I HAVE BEEN HIDING BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WASN'T WHAT I SHOULD SHOW. BUT WHEN YOU DENY PART OF YOURSELF YOU REJECT YOURSELF AS A WHOLE.... THE SIDES OF ME THAT LOVE TO TRAVEL, LOVE CULTURE, AND THAT LONGED TO GET AWAY SO THAT I COULD REFLECT ON ME IN NEW WAYS IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS THE PARTS THAT LOVE TO PROMOTE, PARTY, AND TAKE PICTURES.
I DON'T REGRET ANYTHING THAT HAS HAPPENED IN THESE LAST YEARS BECAUSE THEY WERE NESSCARY SO THAT I COULD GROW. I FOUND WHAT I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE AND I FINALLY TOOK SOMETIME TO DEVOTE TO SOMETHING THAT WASN'T TOTALLY ACADEMIC CENTERED. I HAVE BECOME A WOMAN WHO ISN'T AFRAID TO BE A WOMAN... I'M NOT THE TIMID GIRL SCARED TO LET HERSELF BE SCENE AS SOMEONE OTHER THAN INTELLIGENT..... I HAVE regal, HAVE THE CONCEPT BEHIND shawtz, AND STILL THAT THIRST FOR THE INDUSTRY THAT EVERYONE SAID I COULDN'T BREAK INTO.
STILL RIGHT NOW I KNOW THAT CALI HAS TAKEN ME THIS FAR.... BUT I NEED TO GO LEARN AT A HIGHER LEVEL, AND IN AN ENVIRONMENT OUTSIDE OF MY COMFORT ZONE....
THE NEXT 2 MONTH WILL BE ALL ABOUT PLANNING.... AND THEN THE NEXT FEW EXECUTING... THEN I'LL WAIT TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS AND BE PREPPING FOR THE MOVE.... EVEN IF I DON'T GO STRAIGHT TO howard... I WILL BE MOVING TO dc JAN 2011....
I'LL KEEP YOU GUYS POSTED
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