Dear,
It's amazing how eventually you get over your withdrawl and cravings and they don't affect you.
I've been detoxing from you for two weeks and it just doesn't hurt or get to me anymore. It's like I know it's there but it has no effect on me. The only sadness that I feel is because it had to come to this... I don't even want to hear the why and the excuses cuz they just don't matter.
Face it you were wrong and instead of fixing it you hung yourself....
And I'm not crying over you I'm crying because I'm healing
Always,
- Posted using BlogPress from my iTouch
Showing posts with label HEALING. Show all posts
Showing posts with label HEALING. Show all posts
Friday, January 29, 2010
Saturday, November 8, 2008
LETTERS FROM THE SOL: I WANT TO THANK YOU
DEAR
EVEN WHILE THIS WOUND IS HEALING I CAN FEEL OTHERS HEALING... THE THREE BIGGEST SCARS ACROSS MY HEART ARE MENDING FASTER NOW THAN EVER BEFORE... ALMOST AS IF CLOSURE HAS FINALLY COME.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR NOT RUNNING AFTER ME SO I COULD FINALLY TURN THE PORCH LIGHT OFF. KNOWING THAT YOU DIDN'T I DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO WAIT FOR YOU ANY LONGER, I JUST FEEL THE NEED TO FLY FREE. JUST KNOWING THAT IT REALLY WASN'T MY FAULT OR ANYTHING I DID OR WAS MADE MY TEARS STOP FALLING AND THE LAUGHTER RETURN TO MY VOICE.
EVEN THOUGH LOVE IS STILL THERE I FEEL IT AND THE OTHERS FADING TO NOTHING MORE THAN A WHISPER AT A CONCERT.... THREE TIMES THE LOVE LOST.... AND NOW THE PAIN IS FINALLY DEAF TO ME.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR BREAKING ME SO I COULD HAVE THE STRENGTH TO STAND FOR MYSELF. I AM STRONGER THAN BEFORE YOU AND DESPITE WHAT YOU THINK I NEVER NEEDED YOUR FAITH BUT FAITH IN MYSELF, FAITH THAT REAL LOVE WAS AND STILL IS WAITING FOR ME.
EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT AT FULL STRENGTH EVERY DAY THAT PASSES THE WEAKNESS BECOMES A MEMORY LOST FROM AGE... I CAN FINALLY SAY THAT AFTER FALLING WITH YOU, FOR YOU, AND FROM YOU, I AM READY FOR LOVE.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR LETTING HER GO SO THAT I CAN FINALLY LET YOU GO. NOW THAT YOU HAVE I DON'T FEEL LIKE SUCH A FAILURE FOR LOSING YOU. JUST HEARING THAT IN THE END YOUR LOVE FOR ME WAS GREATER MAKES ME BELIEVE THAT ONE DAY I'LL FIND SOMEONE WHO NEVER WILL LEAVE TO COMEBACK.
EVEN WHILE THIS WOUND IS HEALING I CAN FEEL OTHERS HEALING... THE THREE BIGGEST SCARS ACROSS MY HEART ARE MENDING FASTER NOW THAN EVER BEFORE... ALMOST AS IF CLOSURE HAS FINALLY COME.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR NOT RUNNING AFTER ME SO I COULD FINALLY TURN THE PORCH LIGHT OFF. KNOWING THAT YOU DIDN'T I DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO WAIT FOR YOU ANY LONGER, I JUST FEEL THE NEED TO FLY FREE. JUST KNOWING THAT IT REALLY WASN'T MY FAULT OR ANYTHING I DID OR WAS MADE MY TEARS STOP FALLING AND THE LAUGHTER RETURN TO MY VOICE.
EVEN THOUGH LOVE IS STILL THERE I FEEL IT AND THE OTHERS FADING TO NOTHING MORE THAN A WHISPER AT A CONCERT.... THREE TIMES THE LOVE LOST.... AND NOW THE PAIN IS FINALLY DEAF TO ME.
I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR BREAKING ME SO I COULD HAVE THE STRENGTH TO STAND FOR MYSELF. I AM STRONGER THAN BEFORE YOU AND DESPITE WHAT YOU THINK I NEVER NEEDED YOUR FAITH BUT FAITH IN MYSELF, FAITH THAT REAL LOVE WAS AND STILL IS WAITING FOR ME.
EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT AT FULL STRENGTH EVERY DAY THAT PASSES THE WEAKNESS BECOMES A MEMORY LOST FROM AGE... I CAN FINALLY SAY THAT AFTER FALLING WITH YOU, FOR YOU, AND FROM YOU, I AM READY FOR LOVE.
Monday, October 20, 2008
SOL FOOD 10/20
JUST BECAUSE ITS OLD DOESN'T MEAN THAT IT CANT STILL MAKE YOU LAUGH....
SOMETIMES THE BEST THINGS TO CURE NEW HURTS ARE THE THINGS THAT HAVE BEEN WITH US AND AROUND US THE LONGEST.
SOMETIMES THE BEST THINGS TO CURE NEW HURTS ARE THE THINGS THAT HAVE BEEN WITH US AND AROUND US THE LONGEST.
Monday, September 22, 2008
DISNEYLAND!!!!!!
SO YESTERDAY I SPENT MY DAY AT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PLACES IN THE ENTIRE WORLD....
DISNEYLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT REALLY WAS A TREAT FOR ME IN SO MANY WAYS AND WAS CRAZED. FIRST OF ALL ITS DISNEYLAND A PLACE WHERE I SWEAR MAGIC HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. SECOND YOU CAN SAY THAT I WAS KINDA ON A DATE (EEEK I KNOW) AND IT WAS TOOO FUN AND CUTE TO BE WALK AROUND ALL CUTSEY PIED UP WITH SOMEONE (ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING THE DIASTER THAT WAS k).
SO IT WAS GREAT WATCHING THE LITTLE PRINCE ENJOY HIMSELF IN THE PARK AND WATCHING THE PARADE OF DREAMS. I GOT A PICTURE WITH JASMINE AND ALADIN ON OUR WAY TO CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE WHICH LOOKS SOOOOO CUTE!!!!
MOST IMPORTANTLY I GOT TO RIDE MY FAVORITE RIDE OF ALL TIME SPACE MOUNTAIN!!!!!! I FELT LIKE A LITTLE KID AGAIN BUT IT WAS GREAT... AND EVEN BETTER IT WAS A GREAT DISTRACTION FROM ALL THE SADDNESS THAT k HAD BEEN PUTTING ME THROUGH AND THE STRESS OF MOVIN.
SO AFTER THAT WE WENT TO CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE AND ATE AND ROAD ON SOME OF THE KIDDIE RIDES WITH LIL PRINCE WHICH WAS TOOOO CUTE!!!!! THEN MADE WAY TO THE TOWER OF TERROR WHERE I TRULY WAS TERROIZED... BUT EVEN STILL I LOVED IT!!!!
IT WAS EVEN GREAT BEING HARRASSED ABOUT MY WHITEWASHEDNESS AND WHAT NOT BY geyz... BEING PULLED BY MY HAIR HOWEVER WAS NOT CUTE.... BUT HEY ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GREAT WAY TO END A KINDA SHITTY WEEK.
IT AMAZES ME THAT SOMETHING SO CHILDLIKE AND YOUNG CAN SOLVE ADULT PROBLEMS.... I MEAN SERIOUSLY I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT EVRYTHING THAT HAD BEEN GOING ON... I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT ALL THE BS FROM FRIDAY NIGHT AND WITH the one AND k ALL THAT MATTERED WAS THAT I WAS HAPPY AND HACVING SOO MUCH FUN IT WAS RIDICULOUS!!!! BEING WITH A CUTE GUY HELPED TOOO... (BUT WE SHALL SEE HOW LONG geyz LASTS!!)
CAN'T WAIT TO GO BACK
THANKS t!!!!!!!!!!!!
One mind one heart one voice one soul. One person speaks a word that plants an idea into anothers soul that blooms into a beautiful concept and reality that is seen and spread throughout the world. And by one speaking another listening and sharing and by it gong forth in repetition we spread this Anjlik Sol.....
DISNEYLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT REALLY WAS A TREAT FOR ME IN SO MANY WAYS AND WAS CRAZED. FIRST OF ALL ITS DISNEYLAND A PLACE WHERE I SWEAR MAGIC HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. SECOND YOU CAN SAY THAT I WAS KINDA ON A DATE (EEEK I KNOW) AND IT WAS TOOO FUN AND CUTE TO BE WALK AROUND ALL CUTSEY PIED UP WITH SOMEONE (ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING THE DIASTER THAT WAS k).
SO IT WAS GREAT WATCHING THE LITTLE PRINCE ENJOY HIMSELF IN THE PARK AND WATCHING THE PARADE OF DREAMS. I GOT A PICTURE WITH JASMINE AND ALADIN ON OUR WAY TO CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE WHICH LOOKS SOOOOO CUTE!!!!
MOST IMPORTANTLY I GOT TO RIDE MY FAVORITE RIDE OF ALL TIME SPACE MOUNTAIN!!!!!! I FELT LIKE A LITTLE KID AGAIN BUT IT WAS GREAT... AND EVEN BETTER IT WAS A GREAT DISTRACTION FROM ALL THE SADDNESS THAT k HAD BEEN PUTTING ME THROUGH AND THE STRESS OF MOVIN.
SO AFTER THAT WE WENT TO CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE AND ATE AND ROAD ON SOME OF THE KIDDIE RIDES WITH LIL PRINCE WHICH WAS TOOOO CUTE!!!!! THEN MADE WAY TO THE TOWER OF TERROR WHERE I TRULY WAS TERROIZED... BUT EVEN STILL I LOVED IT!!!!
IT WAS EVEN GREAT BEING HARRASSED ABOUT MY WHITEWASHEDNESS AND WHAT NOT BY geyz... BEING PULLED BY MY HAIR HOWEVER WAS NOT CUTE.... BUT HEY ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GREAT WAY TO END A KINDA SHITTY WEEK.
IT AMAZES ME THAT SOMETHING SO CHILDLIKE AND YOUNG CAN SOLVE ADULT PROBLEMS.... I MEAN SERIOUSLY I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT EVRYTHING THAT HAD BEEN GOING ON... I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT ALL THE BS FROM FRIDAY NIGHT AND WITH the one AND k ALL THAT MATTERED WAS THAT I WAS HAPPY AND HACVING SOO MUCH FUN IT WAS RIDICULOUS!!!! BEING WITH A CUTE GUY HELPED TOOO... (BUT WE SHALL SEE HOW LONG geyz LASTS!!)
CAN'T WAIT TO GO BACK
THANKS t!!!!!!!!!!!!
One mind one heart one voice one soul. One person speaks a word that plants an idea into anothers soul that blooms into a beautiful concept and reality that is seen and spread throughout the world. And by one speaking another listening and sharing and by it gong forth in repetition we spread this Anjlik Sol.....
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